Thursday, September 29, 2011

A testimonial of healing.....

Pieter sent me this letter that he was sending out.
I found it so extremely beautiful and truthful that I wanted to give it greater readership.


Artwork by Burnie     :

If you have seen me in the past three months, you will have noticed that I
have been swept up in a wave of renewed strength and joy.

There’s an upbeat energy pulsing in my veins and it is evident in every
aspect of my life.

I feel more patient, loving, optimistic and aware of the presence of Love.

The turning point came on 22nd July of this year when I met a very powerful
healer from Brazil. She is respected by all who meet her. Some fear her, but
most revere her. She can assess in a matter of minutes what it is that you
need and then provide it in the right form and quantity.

Whether at the physical, mental-emotional or spiritual “level”, she meets
you where you are and then brings you back to balance.

She can be merciless in the way that she dives into your depths and brings
up your “stuff”, instinctively knowing and choosing what is appropriate.

To meet her is to step out of the hallway of life and into a room of
alacrious reality.

I’ve never seen healing like this in all my 24 years of being involved in
the healing arts/sciences.

I spent three evenings in a row with her and then later a fourth, watching
her at work with me, my family, friends and several clients that I had
referred to her.

I came to respect her and the people with whom she works - enormously!

She “read” me easily and correctly and went through the various aspects of
my life, telling me exactly what was needed to bring each to balance.

She was accurate on *every* count and I believe that just her presence
helped heal me in fundamental ways. There are still places in me that await
further attention and I’ll be going back to let her dig deep and cleanse out
my furthest, darkest “recesses”.

It will be my privilege to open up and allow further healing.

I had tears of joy and gratitude rolling down my cheeks after our first

I cannot speak too highly of her.

Her name is Ayahuasca and she takes the form of a plant - a vine that grows
in the Amazon, to be exact. When you drink of her nectar she reveals herself
to you and then you are left in no doubt as to her wisdom, love and healing

If you would like to read more about this profoundly effective plant
medicine then take a look at: 

There comes a time, in the journey from illness to health when powerful and
extraordinary measures are called for. See one man’s account of healing from
liver cancer with this plant:

and another who experienced healing from deep depression, as the Ayahuasca
took her on a harrowing journey to recover the aspects of herself that
splintered off in childhood:

Ayahuasca was introduced to me by two solid, honorable and talented men who
won my respect for their skill in conducting ceremonies and dealing with
human complexities and they have my gratitude for bringing her halfway
across the earth to meet me.

They are Yawa Bane, of the Huni Kuin and his South African counterpart and
assistant Nixiwaka.

Three weeks ago I was offered the opportunity to get to know this teacher
plant more deeply, this time on her home turf - the deepest Amazon jungle.

I feel delighted and privileged to have received an invitation to join a
small group of South Africans, led by Nixiwaka, who have been granted
special permission to travel deep into the Brazilian Amazon,  right up close
to the frontier with Peru and to live awhile with this tribe, the Huni Kuin
Kaxinawa, from 12th December 2011 till 4th January, 2012.

To find out more about the tribe named “People of Truth” who live so close
to nature, take a look at:


In order to avail myself of this opportunity I need to take some time off
from family, friends and clients. No problem - they understand that it is
the opportunity of a *lifetime.*

To avail myself of this amazing offer, it will be necessary to fly to Sao
Paolo, then by small plane to Rio Branco (five day stay over) and then a
boat ride up the river to the home of the Huni Kuin, along with my
contribution to food, accommodation and medicine. This will take
considerable funding.

My recent past and current circumstances have made it impossible for me to
have put savings aside for such an opportunity yet I feel that my vitality
and aliveness are calling out for just such a journey - one of those forks
in the road that says, "Go big, or go home".

Would *you* be at all interested in meeting with and partaking of this
unusual and powerful healing plant, with the help of those who are
experienced in her ways - thus bringing the spirit of the Amazon into your
life, whether through sacred ceremony or individual work?

Would you be willing to help me make this dream come true, whether through
advance payment for encounters to come, with the available guide/s of your
choice, or simply as a donation that will put a smile on my heart for the
rest of my life?

Please let me know if you are moved to help me, whether in some small or big
way, to melt away my comfort zone to* *more fully rediscover the ancient
ways, and then bring this inspiring, teaching medicine back for you to
experience in turn.

Kind regards,

Pieter van der Westhuyzen.

Friday, September 16, 2011

Stepping out of mind.....god willing

My mind is no longer my friend.  I don't know when we reached this impasse but it seems to have stretched for an eternity. It is what comes between what is.   It is not that there is any animosity towards it.  It is , rather there occurs a delight in its absence.  Alongside the most profound thought I can have, is the pettiest thought.  With the most noble feeling is  ride the smallest sense of me.  Thought is mind.
Mind can be rampant if unchecked and seduced.
In the space between thoughts there is a stillness,  a cherished space where nothing can touch the untouchable.   A space of pure being - the natural state.

And yet what seems to have become a pattern is mind is running the show for longer stretches of time.  Or maybe not even more spent in its tyrrany but rather more emotions arising in its presence.  Mostly resistance - resistance to that over there arising in 'this world'.  

Upon awaking in the morning, my son Tao and I head up to the dam where we do our sungazing and walk the dogs.   Because we are in a mountain kingdom by the time the earth spins sufficiently for the sun to be visible it is already quite intense.  It starts off as a strip of light around the mountain and gradually exposes  its full beauty and majesty.  The dam full for now due to winter rains, is either still beyond belief or raging with its own patterns.
At this point all is well in my world.  There is peace,  there is tranquility and there is silence.

Until I come home and turn this machine on.  And link myself up to hell.  My main attraction was to the people I have come to know and love on here, but I see and hear too little for them for the balm of love to heal.  Instead I sit and cover myself in excrement.  Like today for example  Cameron and Sarkozy today declaring they are going to keep bombing Libya.
Like Prick Perry apparently being behind a bill to make the guardasil vaccine mandatory.  49
young women have already died for this and yet this industrial murdering machine allows it to continue.  And even here in Africa big pharma is threatening to shut all us herbalists down.  We won't even go into hackgate and how the entire met in London is free masons.  Is there any wonder that justice had not been served for Daniel Morgan or Madeleine McCann.
And every day it just gets sicker.  Every day I find the stench getting more unbearable.
This is the energy I am aligning myself to.  This is where I put my attention.  And does it help in any way - not a squat.
Can I stop myself from watching the cesspool.  No.

Just go and look at WRH today.  I don't think the page has ever looked worse.   Every story is such a travesty.  One wonders how on earth it got so bad.  Like going to sleep with a mouth full of chewing gum.  The damage done.  On to the next one.  My entire body closing down as the 57 trillion cells that I call me, sense the rest of its body's slaughter and heartache.  I feel it to the core.
The village baker catches me on a walk the other day.  She can just look at me and say a number up to 10.  When she says 10 then I am somersaulting in delight, if one then I am almost under.  She say 2 - and I go yeah.

My spiritual teacher tells me it is all just an appearance.  And I just feel well this horror at the injustice might just be an appearance, yet, it is appearing.  I am not separate from the child in a burn ward screaming, screaming, screaming.  I am not separate from the mother hearing the screaming and her heart smashing open.  And all she can do is hum softly.
In Iraq, In Afghanistan, In Gaza, and now in Libya.  Like 57 trillion cells that make up this body/mind in the dream, are connected to every other 57 trillion cells that make up other body/minds.  All one cell in humanity - human unity.

And then I listen to Jed  McKenna and he says he looks upon burn wards and opening flowers with the same eye.  And that too is true.
There are so many ways for this experiencing to manifest.

By grace, after several hours wrestling  with the magnitude of this injustice - life calls me into the garden where I partake of a plant.  And suddenly as the smoke rise, mind sinks.   There are no burn wards, there are no heartbroken mothers,  there are no corrupt cops.  There is no injustice and stupidity.  There is simply the sun,  the uncurling leaves,  the sweetest aromatic smells of spring.   My amygdala  dance in joy and delight.  The malachite sunbird swoops in op die wilde dagga.   The life has risen again.  It is unfurling and I am experiencing it.  Full on beauty.  No concepts or stories.

Ahhhhhh-  but there is that mind again that feels the need to be taken back to the scenes where so much is felt.   And again the 57 trillion cells are kept away from the beauty and life and fed something different.  Not meaning to pontificate in making a value judgement about one way being right and one way being wrong.  And I would love to accept whatever appeared.  But for that to happen, this individuated  mind needs to lose itself. It is not even about choosing it.  It happens, it unfolds.  It appears to be part of the programming.  How does one break away from the conditioned mind?  

I find myself in the garden by some spiky cactus.  I am told it is san pedro.  growing right at the back, to the right of the vegetable garden.  I have noticed how quickly it has grown.  I also see that there are parts that have been cut and the ends placed on the earth to re root.
Tao comes over to me and we look at them bathed in the sunshine.  Some mouse birds nearby in the loquat tree.   The chickens foraging passionately  around us.  He looks at me and asks me if I want to try it.  Why not - We prepare it - way too much of it.  A long process.  We drink it  - way too much of it.  And it tastes bad in addition to being slimy and gelatinous.  An instant gagging process but I want a break from mind - i want to return to the natural state ,  nothing else calls me deeper.

And as the plant energy causes a change in consciousness, mind feels this absolute terror.
I breathe into it.  I know it is too late to bail out.  I have deliberately eliminated milk thistle from the environment - i want to lose my mind.  And yet when the decoding starts I petition to the energy.  Firstly I beg for gentleness.  No smatterings.  No aborted awakening landing one in a life time of shizoidism.    I don't even want the beautiful visions and patterns.  What my eyes hold in this paradigm is of beauty enough.  I don't want anything that is not always present because then it will be lost.  So plant, show me what you are and thus what I am.
And then I find myself with my true intention in taking that plant and that is to know love.

And suddenly the hallucination turns itself off.
The fire is burning beautifully and there are two candles on the table.  There is a picture I have placed on the chair opposite me.  Next to this image lies a cat.  Every thing is as I know it - there is a great peace - there is a return to  normalcy.  Except that the picture on the couch  is moving.  The face is definitely moving.  The eyes stretch into a smile and the cheeks move in and out as it breathes.  I go to get the picture and bring it closer to me.
This  body is so very light that it feels as if my arms hardly exist - and yet in this lightness they reach out to the frame.  And the next thing I am looking at love.  Pure love.  Those eyes are these eyes.  Not separate.  Not two.  For hours and hours the gaze continues.  Tears flow river like.  Bliss.  This is Bliss.

Suddenly this reality changes.  The plants have availed themselves to me effortlessly and with no cost.  The journeys become increasingly frequent and are always solo.
A year ago I spoke of how Pieter wanted to move into the city and put the kids in schools etc.  He journeyed with a shaman into the land of ayahuasca and he saw the light.  He is wanting to bring the plants into his repertoire.  The dream keeps changing.

A few nights ago I dreamt of enormous boas.  Several meters long and bigger than my waist.  We were in a tangle and I was absolutely helpless.  I was being taken by the serpents.  The next day we are offered a place in an ayahuasca  ceremony in a village just over the mountain.  One has to go around the mountain to get to it.  Very different from here, much greener, much softer.

So once again the opportunity arises for the healing that happens in the absence of identification.
A ' teacher'  says no action needs to be taken.
And of course he is right.
Once again mind sits in fear that it might just lose itself.
And still the dance is danced.

I enter this realm again  with the intention  of love.
Nothing more than love.
May it fill my very being till completion.
May this cell in the body of humanity catch some light.

Note :  The face above, that of Ramana Maharshi.   Meeting his teachings was an eye opener.  For many years I had one book.  And no photograph.  And at that age I was prone to devotion.  When we moved to this village, I met someone who had been to the ashram in India and who gave me a photograph.  A few years later I went myself and the librarian took a shine to me and sent me boxes of books and photographs of Ramana.   Suddenly we had these pictures and after the fire they were the only pictures we had.  Slowly they found frames.  A friend of mine, an over top extremely camp decorator used to walk in roll his eyes and say oh god the ole guy again.   So this picture is always with me.  Always.
And yet on this occasion it spoke.
It spoke the only language worth hearing.

Thursday, September 1, 2011

maybe, must maybe, Libya can prevail.

Well, we were told Tripoli had fallen that Muammar Gadaffi was slinking away in the sewers and this heart froze.

No, no came the scream from the entire being.
If this madness is not brought to an end now - then it will never cease.
The insanity of corporate takeovers becomes nation take overs.
And now it is not the photocopiers that are split up between different sections, it is real limbs, it is real families, it is the total future.  And yet funnily enough it always plays out on the stock exchange.  If we note,  the American market has not plummeted to the bottom of the ocean where it belongs.

Many years ago I had a dream of being in the desert and coming upon an encampment and meeting this man. In the dream there was no conflict and he was in a rush to another area, yet I was taken by his empathy, his presence and his humour.  Why this dream arose I have no idea, but I have always looked upon him with the utmost respect.

And yet, what does one do in the face of this onslaught.
Which is total.
But which does show that this man has a lot of support to have survived what he has survived.
My prayer is that he continues to not only survive but to overcome and in turn become the conqueror.

Several things arise:

Every half an hour a candle is lit.
At the end of the day there are candles burning throughout the house.
Each one has the intention for the mammalian energy to win this war.
The energy that speaks of equality, of honouring the people in your land, of having a faith, of living with integrity and not deliberately harming others of understanding the intelligence of community.
On the other side of this is the reptilian energy which is solo - actions which are taken for the benefit of one and never more than self.
Thousands of black Libyans are currently being rounded up by the sponsored killers.
Muammar is speaking of not hiding like women but destroying it all.
Because why the hell should they leave anything for the invading forces to benefit from.
Maybe, just maybe this determination might just be  the one which event in space and time which  unhinges the axis that this warmongering has benefited from of late.
And some forces feed on the blood bled  and yet other forces celebrate each act of truly tribal organisation and dynamics and the harmony that arises from that.

It has occurred to me that we are not powerless individuals anchored in the waters of chaos and horror.  That we have the ability and the majesty to create what we desire.  Not for our individual selves, like the car and the home and the picket fence and such, but those desires that are for the greater good of all.
It is a standard meditation to breathe in the white light and release all the darkness from within oneself.
I feel it would be appropriate if we all breathe in all the horror happening in Libya right now, bring it into our own beings,  meet it there with full awareness and presence,  and release back to Libya the purest light and joy.  The absolute best intention.  A faith in divine intelligence prevailing and winning.

I don't know what else to do.
Please join me in these simple steps in taking care of our fellow cells in this vast body of humanity.
Let the light shine in this darkness.